Waiting

It is the season of waiting. Everything is in place, nearly everything of importance is ready. All we're waiting for is a baby to show up. :)

This past Saturday, we got a new car seat (a toddler, forward-facing one) for Cillian, so that his old car seat can be used for Jameson. It has made a remarkable difference in his mood, now that he is able to see everything the way we do in the car. His first ride in his new seat was to church Sunday morning, and he smiled and laughed the whole way. I'm so happy he loves it. It's cute - he kind of gets this little grin when he knows he is about to get put in his seat. Such a nice change from the resistant mini tantrums we've been dealing with.

So that is a very important thing that is now taken care of with flying colors!

I just ordered a new diaper bag on Amazon.com, since we lost the one we had at a rest stop last May. (We've been using a borrowed tote for the time being.) Very excited about this new one though. It's called a Diaper Dude diaper bag, and it really looks quite manly. Designed for dads essentially, it is a messenger bag style with one shoulder strap (which leaves both hands free), and has several zippered compartments, which makes keeping things organized easy. A bit more on the expensive end for a diaper bag, but I think we'll be exceedingly happy with it! Plus, it's very masculine-looking, we will have two boys, and my husband is eager to use it. Win, win, win.

I'm visiting the doctor's office weekly now - 39 weeks as of Wednesday! My doctor estimated Jameson to be 8 pounds already... and that was last Wednesday. So, I've been trying to avoid sweets and sugary things for these remaining weeks so as not to contribute to making this baby any bigger than he has to be! I'm guessing that he'll be around a week late, and nearing 10 pounds. Just to be safely prepared. Due date is November 2nd, so I'm giving him until the 9th. But we'll see... he might be in more of a hurry than I'm giving him credit for. :)

In the meantime, I'm just enjoying the days I have at home with Cillian, my little buddy. We have such a nice routine, and though it will be refreshing to have a new change to adjust to, I sure will miss our peaceful mornings together, just him and me. I hope I can consciously pay as much attention to him as he needs from me, despite having a new little son to bond with. I'm looking forward to being a mother of two boys!

Not to go into a complaining session of the aches and pains of third-trimester pregnancy, but I sure feel ready to get this kid out. I can feel the stress on my body and the timer is ticking. I will miss all this kicking and moving though. Jamie is quite an active little fella. I think I saw a foot pop out the other day! He is head down and ready to go, which is something I'm particularly grateful for. This also means that his feet are continuously sneaking their way up into my ribs...

I'm finding myself looking forward not only to finally holding Jameson and getting to see him for the first time (and the physical relief that childbirth will bring), but actually going through labor and delivery naturally again. I have to say, I've never had quite a spiritual experience as I had when giving birth to Cillian. Truthfully, (and not to be mock-modest or anything) labor was not as painful as I expected it to be, and yes, it is painful - any woman who has given birth knows this! But it is truly the best pain I have ever felt. There is so much good in this kind of pain. And I wish every woman could experience childbirth as deeply spiritual. There you are, in the presence of God, sacrificing, laboring, being.

Fr. Meletios Weber says in "Bread & Water, Wine & Oil" that one can only find God in the present. He does not exist in the past nor the future, which are the dwelling places of the mind. But the heart, the nous, he says, dwells in the present. And there, we can be. Not reminiscing or imagining, as our minds' nature takes us to the past or future, but being. This is what I felt in the midst of the pain while in labor - the pain continually brought me into the present, where God was, and there I was able to work through it, contraction after contraction through the end.

Not all pain is bad... I think it's kind of sad how many women (and more specifically American women, I've read) seem to be so eager to request pain medication for such a miraculous occasion as giving birth to a baby. It is not an illness, or something to be avoided though there happens to be a "cure for the pain" nowadays. Women centuries and thousands of years before us have given birth naturally perfectly capably without medical assistance. Our female bodies were created to handle this joyous occasion, in all of its pain and pleasure. If God didn't include natural painkillers in the beginning, perhaps they aren't meant to be had! The pain meant to be felt is good, and even more, it is holy.

There are some things that are meant to be experienced organically, naturally, I believe. And childbirth, in my opinion is certainly one of them. There is so much one can miss in this experience. I just know for me, that I am determined to experience all of it, to feel all of it, as I believe God intended.

In childbirth, women are continually working out their salvation, hand in hand with God. It is good work. It is holy work, to bring a baby, life, into the world.

I didn't quite mean to get so zealous about the subject... do forgive me if I have been too opinionated!

I am ready. I'm ready to meet my Jameson.

Back to preparing... I have several long lists (anyone who knows me well knows that I loooooove making lists,) of what needs to be done before he arrives. Much of it includes last minute straightening and tidying and organizing, making some plans for Christmas (so I have it easier come December, when it's actually time to think about Christmas...), and also packing for the hospital. I really hope I'm prepared by the time he comes. I keep thinking that I've got several weeks left on the timer, but really, he could come ANY time now!

I'll keep you posted on how things progress. For now, I'll leave you with the Quote of the Day! This one made me chuckle...

Thanks for reading. :)

Cheers.


"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one." ~ Leo J. Burke